Plug for a Paring Knife

Where the expressions of science met the guardians of elegant sufficiency

I sat beside my Grandfather the day he died of a heart attack.  He was seated on our living room couch, sharpening a pencil with a whittling knife.  He did not make a sound when he passed; he just stopped moving.  Our yellow parakeet had somehow escaped its cage and was wildly flying around the living room, chirping fearfully, quite alarmed.  I felt a strong presence of spirit in the air and sensed it was Grandpa.  I was five years old and didn’t understand death yet. 

Grandpa had always treated me with loving kindness, encouraged me by spending time with me, and he taught me how to whittle wood.  Sadly, shortly after he passed, I broke the jackknife he gifted me.  I ‘made do’ with a paring knife from the kitchen drawer.  I industriously keep my eye open for interesting pieces of wood to whittle, and no matter where I went, I faithfully carried that paring knife in the back pocket of my “britches” as my Grandpa used to say. 

One day, my brother and I went over to a friend’s house to play, but nobody was home.  We amused ourselves on their backyard tire swing, played on monkey bars, slides, etc. 

An idea from school captured my curiosity and had been percolating in my little brain.  Whenever I learned something new or fascinating, I would always pass that lesson on to my little brother.  Having learned about electricity from a teacher, I decided to show him what I learned.  The teacher had earnestly cautioned us that water and metal are conductors of electricity, and assured us that wood in not a conductor of electricity.  To provide evidence to my little brother that an electric current cannot travel through wood, we walked over to a 220-Volt socket to conduct my first Show & Tell speech. 

Since my paring knife had a wooden handle covering the metal, I believed I could safely insert it into the socket.  I pulled open the gray metal safety guard from the socket and drew the paring knife from my back pocket. I told my brother to watch me, as I began explaining the laws of electricity. 

I boldly went where no bright boy had gone before, and confidently plugged my knife into the socket.  My lecture ended as I experienced 220-volts of electricity coursing through my body.

Suddenly, I became terrifyingly aware my lesson went awry.  My young mind hadn’t considered that metal rivets held the wooden handle of the knife together, and I was touching them.  The powerful current flowed through me, holding my entire body frozen in place. 

My brother must have sensed something was wrong, (maybe because for once because I was not talking).  He said, “Are you alright?  Are you alright?”  Unable to move my lips due to electricity coursing through my body, I strained out the words, “I ant oove!  I ant oove!”  (‘I can’t move, I can’t move’).  With trembling voice, he asked, “Do you want me to pull you away?”

I quickly responded, “Oh! Oh!  Own ush e! Own ush e!"  (that is, ‘No!  No!  Don’t touch me!  Don’t touch me’!)  I remembered the teacher warning us about the dangers of touching an electrocuted person is that they are victim to a bigger jolt than the electrocuted person.

At this desperate point, I thought a silent, frantic prayer for help, thinking, “God, help me.”  Just then, I felt two large, strong hands pressing down firmly on my shoulders.  Those hands yanked me backward away from the plug, freeing me from my electrical prison!  

Stunned, I turned around to see who helped me.  Only my wide-eyed brother was there.  While I knew my brother could not have been the one that saved me, I was befuddled by what happened.  I gave my brother a stern parental look and firmly demanded, “Did you touch me?”  With quivering fear in his voice, he said, “No.”

Perhaps the two strong hands on my shoulders belonged to my guardian angel.  Maybe it was my grandfather. 

In later years, I once sensed that my grandfather was helping me.  I was on the way to the hospital for a biopsy and was afraid I would die.  I read that a small number of people die from the biopsy needle piercing a vein, and the patient dies.  On the way to the hospital, I was praying hard for comfort and protection.  I then heard a gentle male voice say in my ear, “You’ll be OK.” 

The voice possessed a peaceful love that poured through my soul.  And the voice seemed familiar, somehow.  I wondered at the time if it was my grandpa.  Maybe he is an angel?

Today, I view this early experience as evidence that God has a purpose for my life.  At the very least, it was an answer to prayer.  Through the years, I have had supernatural experiences that have saved my life.  While I cannot say for a certainty what precise design appears scripted for my life, it seems I had been protected me from harm.  To me, it is today less important that God shields me from harm in this world.  As one of God's faithful servants said in the Bible, “Yea, though he slays me, yet will I love Him.”  Selah!

Psalm 91:11 “For he shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways.”  KJV

Chapter 1

Plug for a Paring Knife

Are You Offendable?

 When you say to yourself and others that it is not possible for humans to forgive, it sounds really interesting. I'm betting you're right, but I don't 100% know what you mean by it yet. This is not the same as doubt, by the way. Can you explain what you mean, please?

OK, sure, I’ll give it a shot.

For me, forgiveness is unnecessary if one is not offended in the first place, as being 'offended' signals to me that one is 'offendable,' which admission is recognition is a higher state of responsibility. Letting Go and Letting God is a reconciliation or ‘acceptance’ of life on life’s terms.

On a second front, if one has turned their will and life over to the care of God, why should offenses and forgiveness exist? As with most if not all humans, 100% forgiveness existing 100% of the time seems impossible. For example, I keep saying the Serenity Prayer, but sublime 'forgetting' has its merit, so maybe saying the Senility Prayer leads to serenity, too? LOL!

But 'impossible' is God's favorite word, for it becomes a playground of nutritive soil, AKA 'powerless' and getting out of one's own way so Creator God can have full reign returns us to our original state of innocence. Sorry about all this God Talk stuff, but I can say that forgiveness of the most difficult events that happened in my life transpired through prayer and God sending love in the place of pain. I wrote about the experience in my book, in the chapter about forgiving my abuser. I no longer let the words ‘my’ and ‘abuser’ remain as points of pain. Since my life is no longer my own, how does ‘my abuser’ hold sway over my consciousness

There is One who has ALL power, that one is God…may you find Her now.

Sentio Ergo Sum Cogito, by The Incomplete Skeptic, Timothy G Cameron

Let's start the Church of the Impetuous Paradox where we "spend" time inspecting the history of forever & chronologize eternity. LOL!

Truth without paradox is dead.

No disrespect intended, but both the delegates of 'Pseudo cum laude' Cogito Ergo Sum entourage and René Descartes belonged in a Thinker's Anonymous meeting. Descartes glorified thinking and abandoned himself (and relegated others) to the systematized, outside-in approach to life. But real sunshine comes from the inside-out.

Sentio ergo sum cogito.  I Feel (the heart), therefore, I Think (the mind) I Am. For me, the mind is the thinking part of the heart, and the heart is the feeling part of the mind. Mind and heart are ONE. The Greeks did so much to revolutionize culture abroad and I celebrate this, but they also made schizophrenics of generations for thousands of years by focusing on mind and marginalizing heart.

Thoughts are the substance of mind, as hope is the substance of things unseen, and UNSEEN like Adam Smith's Invisible Hand is the wiping off the dust from the Mirror that is Humanity's God or Higher Power.

Original Mind & Original Heart are One. Have you ever heard the saying, be ye as little children, for such is the Kingdom of God? THAT! I've also read that “Knowledge is a polite word for dead but not buried imagination.” e.e. cummings

I'm in charge of what I say, you're in charge of what you hear. The same applies to the written word. The Alpha and the Omega/the snake eating itself, as above so below/on earth as it is in Heaven all bear common or ancient ancestry. Sit back and dwell on that silently for a while.

I draw an ironic smile when I hear someone say that 'feelings are not facts' because I believe that Love (a feeling) is the Greatest Fact ever experienced. Drawing abstract consciousness from the original mind is like unsheathing the flaming sword protecting Eden's Tree of Life, and is akin to a solution feasting like vampires on problems. "Live in the solution" sounds good to the EGO, but is the paradigm of self-slavery to the extreme. Goethe related that the most secure prison is the one we don't know we are in.

War is the greatest paradigm of forced cooperation, yet comprehension is not a Peacekeeper requirement of cooperation. Respect is. Forcing solutions and imposing harmony is a maladaptive dire sickness plaguing us, leading to a societal psychosis that even music might not cure. Music and poetry, prayer and acts of compassionate discourse have helped save my life through the years. Let's bring that back into focus again.

The great philosopher Rodney King nailed it, but cruel satirical headlines attended his echoes, but I'll repeat his unconditional grace here because true freedom lives in the Questions of Life and not so much in the answers: "Can't we all just get along?"

As ‘The Picard’ would say: “ENGAGE” and as someone near and dear to my heart said some 2,000 years ago, “Love one another.”

Monkey Mind: Diving into Difficulties 'Trust First'

At worst, all difficulties represent a quest to learn selfless-control. Intuitively decoding what to let go of is 1) an art realized within the current form & framework known as our lives, but deeply ingrained attitudes of our past lives (everything from a second ago is a past life) declares HOW we place emphasis on seemingly non-linear, spiritual values.

This is a quest-tion (Elevated Quest) to learn to see life from other people's points of view and to become adept in the 2) art of communication. When it comes to not being distracted from our own agendas, we tend to view questions as nothing less than a tendency to restless and irritable distractability. Develop contemplative focus, and then witness your ability to communicate your ideas in ways that help many people in your sphere of influence. Don’t be Beverly surprised when your peeps act like purring kittens; they will echo resoundingly as heartbeats of gratitude in your energetic Learning Curve. At worst, consider the distractions of life as a meaningful tour through God's Cosmic Kitchen. Nothing is anyone's fault.

As we turn up the heat on the proverbial frog or ‘Culture of Blame’, consider how one of the frog’s prized children, formerly known as metaphorical Global Warning "It's Your Fault" are actually knowingly acting as Insurance Incubators (follow the money); all the while, the Blamologists ripen on their tree. Seems crazy, but the addiction to anger burns rhyme and reason alike.

This bend in the road appears arbitrary, but remember that Emily Dickenson said to “dwell in possibility.’ I was reading Carlos Castenada's books long before my drug tests would have all come back dirty (in my formative years) and I'm still digesting life on life's terms from Don Juan’s lessons (I’m still drug-free after a 19-year break from "normal"). Coincidently, I think it was the Eagle's lead singer who said he only got drunk once...for 19 years.

Learn to enjoy your words as they agitate ideas as a Namaste washing machine runs by monkeys. If the load is making noise because the garments are out of balance, don’t through the clothes away and don’t attack the machine. You're part of the Universal Conspiracy to Love. Slow down, open the lid, rearrange the load, close the lid, and enjoy. Although many are called to the machine, few say yes. Accept the saying that ‘normal’ is a setting on a dryer.

Steps 3, 4 & 5 Governs Facing Fears

“Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom.” Søren Kierkegaard

“The truth will set you free. But not until it is finished with you.” David Foster Wallace

"Always do what you are afraid to do." Ralph Waldo Emerson

The 'Big Book' helped birth my freedom and reads that ‘we are driven by a hundred forms of fear.’ That it is “An evil corroding thread.” This is not necessarily phobias but is rather the FEAR (False Evidence Appearing Real) that is driven by our egoic/apparent (or real) instinctual 'needs.'

When we act out of fear, it is commonly due to one of our three basic needs being threatened. When we probe wounds, the places that are infected, we are likely to feel pain, but we are suggested to be 'fearless and thorough' (entirely willing) from the very start.

To begin breaking the addiction to the judgment of others and of self-loathing, we move into the 4th Step Higher Powered by the 3rd Step. The 5th Step removes the puss that aggravates the infection. The infection dies in the light of love. So open the infection, clean it out, then take up your bed and walk. Don't quit before the miracle happens. Removing the obstacles to the love of others as yourself; it helps bring into true focus what WE mean. 'We' are God, you and me.

OK, you know me, here come the G-Words. God & Grace.

“Love is all, it gives all, and it takes all.” Soren Kierkegaard

Unconditional Grace is our duty, but we have to say YES because it's not foisted on us because of our Free Agency. God delves deeper into the human heart than the knife of unforgiveness can fathom. Without an offense, forgiveness is impossible, and forgiveness is a requirement of love. Forgiveness runs deeper than the offense which requires its presence. It's like the seed of love is at the tips of the knife that stabs us. IT MIGHT TAKE A WHILE, SOMETIMES A LONG WHILE TO HEAL, but as the saying goes, it ain't easy, but it's worth it.

In God's Economy, nothing is wasted. IMPOSSIBLE is God's favorite word and is why being ‘powerless returns us to a state of original innocence and we thus get our true power back.

Daily Reprieve of Surrender

1) I ask (pray) God to direct my thinking, then I am free to think. It's a daily task for me. My happiness is not essential to doing God's Will, just as comprehension is not a prerequisite to cooperation, but it does bring me peace or at least enough peace to be grateful.

Then, 2), I look to do God's Will in loving others as I love myself.

3) With a deep breathGod in God enters and a deep breath out, negatives are exhaled.

4) Thank God for everything and

5) Trust God, intuitively knowing or believing that it is impossible to be off of one's spiritual path once it's surrendered.

As the saying goes, IMPOSSIBLE is God's favorite word. We have “a daily reprieve contingent upon the maintenance of our spiritual condition.’ Christ is the Master Builder.

Every day that I get up, I am in the practice of thanking God for another day of living, no matter how I might feel or think things are looking down. I recall Zig Ziglar said, When life looks down, try the Up look.”

The Bravery of Humility Frees the Killer from Himself & Separation Consciousness

Some things I wrote years ago that are related to yesterday’s Blogpost.

The Bravery of Humility Frees the Killer from Himself

Thus held they funeral for Hector tamer of horses, for the father of fifty sons kissed the hand of the killer, begging favor of proper burial. This ‘is’ how the enraged killer finally finds respite from losing his dear BFF Pat who dressed in masks for battle posed as the killer, but who was slain by Prince Hector. The head of the snake was severed that fateful day, leaving its undigested tail to writhe unceremoniously in the sand. But, in the way of all things absurd, resentment resurrects the despaired wound, thus re-held to reconnect head & tail, and the war, 2,500 years later? Love re-dies on the Plains of Hesitation. Had Thetis not tried to make the killer immortal by dipping him in the River Styx without holding his heal free to the open air, the resistance to repentance would have died a grateful, beautifully regurgitated death. “All is laughter, all is dust, all is nothing; everything is born of unreason." Glycon. And that’s why Baptism by Fire is a battle between water & fire gods. People die every day unnoticed by most as no more than a pesky pothole, forgotten in the comfort of Silentarian Summers.

This I wrote 5 years ago:

Separation Consciousness is an illness. We are One, as silly as that sounds to so many people. If I am loving, then I love. Seeing people FROM love is it...hugs are not illegal, but it's amazing how trust seems to be relegated to those who "earn" it. What a bunch of BS. "If equal affection cannot be, let the more loving one be me". Sometimes a sincere hug or smile might save someone's life. Never give up coming from love. Never forget who you are. I love you. Pass it on.

Gravitas of Anonymity or is it just the Anesthesia of Alzheimer's

People seem to have such a deep misunderstanding about what it means to have peace which surpasses all understanding. EGO would rather supplant peace with either logic, the masked but lifeless airs of Saturnian science whose cynical contempt of faith (pretentious or self-aggrandizing attitudes of sneering ‘sensibilities’), or caress control mechanisms both physiological and psychological.

I am NOT against science, but turning it into a worshipful master with the practitioners as mini-gods is futile. When science and faith speak a common dialect, the world is a beautiful light for all to walk the paths of.

Trust with a capital-T doesn’t require comprehension to swim in the placid or stormy seas of cooperation. Peace is not necessarily a pacifist road. Peace and trust require a deep sense of balance to dance on tempests, the willingness to either be fearless or at least face one’s fears with unfathomable daring (which I did in prison), and to kiss one’s love without cognizant desire or a sense of jealousy nor anticipation of reward. No easy task sometimes.

Philosophers and Poets birth their Janus dreams after making love to the eternal Phoenix of their own destructions. Chaos Theory strings us along until we find Order, which in turn implodes into a black hole of overthinking which eventually creates another Big Bang and off we go again, searching for Atlantis.

The Phoenix is forever rising but logic seeks to define its anchor, like Zeus punishing Prometheus while rejoicing with some fava beans and a nice chianti as the eagle of dogma devours his liver. Facing one’s peace ‘always’ in moving momentous mountains of NOW which demands more audacity than facing one’s fears. 

“Meek: Power under control’, humility, requires great peace and acceptance and not fearing one’s OWN power. God teaches the martial arts, but the artist knows not from whence his plan manifests, just as the kisser knows not what syntax transcends gratitude.

“But in the end one needs more courage to live than to kill himself.” Camus

Now I’ve written this blog in the same formula of writing poetry. I don’t know if I’m comin’ or goin’, and I’m OK with Anonymity.

One of my very favorite Messengers.

https://youtu.be/w53EmDa9hAg

the new old kiss (poem)

got a ghost i call my sin
in my skin
bend
in
the ray of darkness
hanging on the night
full of walking on firewater,
until like winds
we dodge the raids of 'what ifs'
radius, and
win

Skating on the skin of frozen rivers,

we live to die another day,

another way,

until our hearts open wider

than the jaws of death can gape.

Reactionarians: Response Ability in Communication

Depending on what we are paying attention to, there are many opportunities to experience substantial duress, yet we don’t have to attend every fight we find ourselves invited. Maintaining a rational sense of composure in the face of emotionally charged ideas, often masking themselves as substantial ‘reasons’ to lose one’s composure, is ever a challenge.  

Becoming the very problem we are seeking to ameliorate arises from an over-focus, AKA, Solution-addiction. Ironically, solutions require problems to solve; when the issue fades, the answer does, too.

Let’s take a temporary detour from my argument. Solutions are like forgiveness. For example, a solution (forgiveness) needs a problem (offense), and are both vampires in the relationship. It’s part and parcel of the Blame Game, and if you’ve read my past Blogs, you might remember that I suggest we hang up the Blamethrower. If we are not offendable, then there’s nothing to forgive.  

“Don’t walk in front of me… I may not follow
Don’t walk behind me… I may not lead
Walk beside me… just be my friend” - Albert Camus

Let’s push the envelope here. If there is no judgment, there’s no judge or jury. If there’s no offense, the court closes. The predators and prosecutors (sometimes one and the same) all go home. Is it a panacea to imagine such a world, one where we have no courts? I believe in natural law & order. Our conscience is our judge. The United States Constitution does not give rights but instead describes inalienable rights that we already have. Government is there to uphold organic, natural law. But frequently, if not always, humans digress when they start passing laws to protect the rules that are already in place. As Tacitus said, “The more the laws, the more corrupt the government.” The comparisons I’m drawing here are an exercise in serving the BEST (God is in control…Let Go, Let God) but does not serve what’s ‘good’ (dictatorial human thinking). The Best is the enemy of the good (in the ‘good’s mind’ perspective or opinion), but not vice-versa.  

““There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies.” ― Martin Luther King Jr.”

There is only One righteous Judge, which makes me wonder why, if God allows a thing, could the existing dirty-deed (thing) be part of a Sacred Contract? Could the end-product of joy rise higher than the depth of pain? Doesn’t the dormant seed of forgiveness find its home at the very tip of the knife that painfully plunges into the soil of our soul? 

Okay, this perspective is a hard pill to swallow, maybe, and my last Blog Post might bear testimony to as much, but I only lost one subscriber to my List. I knew it was controversial but posted it anyway. Maybe it’s because I’m risking testing people’s sense of self-examination, and I overstep my boundaries in so doing; I hope it’s OK because that’s what risk does. Yet risk is always present when we ask real questions, and the evolution of questioning disproves the so-called virtue of our admission that we know the answers in any absolute way. The facts, answers or solutions, knowledge, whatever you want to call it, leads to killing questions. Knowledge destroys faith, similarly. If someone believes in God but says they KNOW God is real, they’ve just assassinated belief or faith itself. Knowledge is a safe anchor that tethers one dogmatically to ‘their truth.’ Sure, the truth will set you free, but when it’s made into a law, and we beat each other over the head with it, we have lost our way.

““Folks, it’s time to evolve. That’s why we’re troubled. You know why our institutions are failing us, the church, the state, everything’s failing? It’s because, um – they’re no longer relevant. We’re supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right?”
― Bill Hicks”

Here’s my risky proposition: I killed Little Timmy. It was wrong and always will be, right? But what if viewing Timmy and myself in Sacred Relationship or Sacred Contract changes all that?  WHAT IF  Timmy and I had/have a Sacred Contract? If we do, is there anything for Timmy and me to aggrieve or forgive? Yes, it took me years to love and forgive myself for my actions that dreadful day, but we are supposed to Love God with all our heart, mind, and soul. If we do that, how is there any room for hatred or a lack of forgiveness? If we have turned our will and our life over to the care of God, our problems belong to God and not to ourselves, yes?  

If your eye is filled with light, your body is too.

The follow-up to this purity of heart (to will one thing, love) is that with this kind of Love, we are free to love others as we love ourselves (yes, love ourselves, too). With love as our focus (God is Love), we begin to peacefully accept the things we can’t change and acquire Higher Wisdom to know what things we can’t and cannot change. To me, “Serenity” is a Gift. That’s why we ask for it in the Serenity Prayer.  Prayer is part of our Spiritual Vision Board or the Intent of our Earthly Vision Board.  

I know of many great examples of people who loved those who were hurting them. It seems more challenging to handle when someone we love is hurting us. By starting or continuing to be loving, they didn’t justify the hurtfulness inflicted upon them and label their love as a sure sign of weakness. Instead, they realized they needed to be fully human, accepting both what they ‘need’ to forgive and that getting angry and feeling unforgiving is…human. But someone famously said, ‘Let he who is without fault, throw the first rock. But seething our emotional lives in that anger is a sometimes necessary part of forgiveness, but the longer we stew in the juices of resentment, the more likely we are to start becoming what we hate (hating the haters).

“Often those that criticize others reveal what he himself lacks.”
― Shannon L. Alder

Reputation destruction, innuendo, and gossip are the passive-aggressive themes of modern-day rock throwing. They are the justifications of a Cold Was mentality and is more common among white-collar combatants than blue-collar (blue collar is a bit more physically assaultive). The dark masculine resorts to violence more often than the dark feminine does, and generally, the dark feminine tends toward reputation destruction and the passive-aggressive arts. I bring this up for one central point. It’s to illustrate what I argued earlier in this write: ‘depending on what we are paying attention to, there are a great many opportunities to experience substantial duress.’  

Did you read the preceding statement with a peaceful mind and think about healing aggressive and passive-aggressive people? The opportunity to hear seemingly divisive ideas positively will heal many an insomniac night of tossing and turning. I don’t think our culture is rife with security or tyranny, but rather a mixture of the two. Nature or Natural “Law” is neither catastrophizing nor benevolent but can be construed as both. I think Nature should be studied but not controlled, and the same applies to the law. Keeping the peace is fine, but enforcement of the law, not so much.  

When someone says a thing that is hard to hear, listen twice as hard.

Success through provocation ain’t my shtick. What propels me most to victory in a debate is to say little or nothing to provoke enforcement of my ideas. Being stress-resistant doesn’t mean there’s no stress, but rather one doesn’t cave to stress and make rash decisions. With a few notable exceptions, most of my life mistakes were impulsive or made in a hurry.  

If one is not familiar with one’s detractors’ full argument, one is ill-suited for debate. While I don’t subscribe to the ‘If you don’t have something good to say, don’t say anything’ rule, I do believe it is a useful idea. Say what you mean, m what you say, but don’t say it mean’ is a common reiteration I fall back on, as is to ‘be the more loving one’ with unloving people (they make it easy…lol). Noticing the weakness in others but looking for their strengths takes practice to habituate. Repetition is the mother of all learning.  

Consider the possibilities as to why a person is saying what they are saying.

The study of reactions and the people that study them. Reactionarians. There is no such word, and that’s OK with me. It’s none of my business to legislate what others think of me, or vice-versa. It’s none of my business to legislate what I think of or feel about myself, and it’s none of my business to legislate what God (if there is one) thinks of you or me.  

I'm Back

I had one heck of a time of it over the last couple of years. I didn’t even brush my teeth while sick and my teeth are in horrible shape as a result, but that’s life. Shingles, then cancer, then dealing with my ‘New Normal.” I brushed my teeth three days in a row now. As strange as that sounds, it’s true. I was really ‘stuck’ on finding how I might adapt to all this. Sure, I trusted God and all that good stuff, had tools on my belt for survival, but I need to raise my behavior to a higher level and now feel I can. Wish me luck but for sure say some prayers.

Here’s some photographs, JPEGS, and concepts that help describe my life.

I made a short video about Saturday’s upcoming ZOOM meeting on dignified rules of debate.

https://us02web.zoom.us/rec/share/DlAfK1WS6SO4KRGzQNEaDCIi_ekpW0yTrK6OCsFAESiqap6gIClyyrsI_Tv26w.2zf5SbRc_8cFBEzI

Access Passcode: 5thRevLove@

Some of my References for Speaking

Fay Connors, Twin Cities Prison Ministry Board Chair. Her contact information: 952-250-7613 Tcpm.fay@gmail.com:

“Are you looking for an impactful speaker? Someone who’s story is so compelling, it holds you on the edge of your seat. Timothy Cameron has changed lives because he has worked hard to change his. He started with less than most, survived a life that eventually, through hard work, forgiveness, reconciliation, and compassion, has led him to bring those same attributes to others. He walks his talk and continues to inspire others. Timothy has been a speaker for Twin Cities Prison Ministry workshops since 2014. His willingness to share his most vulnerable insights into his life has helped others to have hope for their future and to engage others in the work of prison ministry. Please feel free to contact me if you have questions about Timothy’s presentations for us.”

Paul Meunier, Executive Director, YIPA, Youth Intervention Programs Association. Contact information: paul@yipa.org 763-434-4190.

“Timothy was great to work with and our members of the association thoroughly enjoyed his talk. I have received a lot of feedback that his message touched people emotionally. His courage to tell his story and grit to improve his circumstances in life is an inspiration to everyone.”

Naishome Williams, Child Protection Case Manager (Naishome worked with Timothy G in different groups). Contact information: naishomewilliams@yahoo.com

“I had the pleasure of working with Timothy when I was an intern in April of 2016 at 180 Degrees, Inc. I sat in a class where he gave his very inspirational speech, which was based on not only courage in the power of forgiveness and resilience but also hope. I felt that Timothy was a very inspirational speaker and that he has a message that could be spread among many people as an example of what can happen when you truly want to implement change within your life and the life of others.”

Chris B. Schneider, Strategic Sourcing Manager at MoneyGram International, written December 4, 2016. Contact information: 651-238-9704 (Mobile) thes144@msn.com

‘I have known Timothy for over twenty years through MADD. Not only is Tim a close friend, but I also value his inclusion on MADD Victim Impact Panels. He is a very accomplished speaker that is able to reach youth through his experience. I would highly recommend Tim for any speaking engagement concerning youth or any age group, as Tim is a well-read individual with much to offer any organization.’

Daniel Maurer, Freelance Writer, Small Business Owner — Synecdoche, LLC — Mount Curve Press, reference written November 21, 2016,

“Timothy is the type of person who exudes kindness and humility. He had hired Mount Curve Press at Synecdoche (my company) to help him with his web presence. Working with him, I found he was clear in describing what he wanted the website to do for him. Above and beyond that, I have personally heard Timothy speak—his comfort level in speaking publicly is not only without a hint of anxiety; he interacts well with any audience. Timothy is a hard worker and endeavors to be on time for his appointments and will follow through to get the job done. I recommend him without hesitation for any job that deals with the public or demands a team-player to effect real change for communities.” - Daniel D. Maurer, Freelance Writer and Founder of Synecdoche, LLC and Mount Curve Press, a niche publisher in St. Paul, Minn.

Annie Culver, reference written July 15, 2015.

“Whether among friends or with a formal audience, Timothy speaks with poetic honesty. His story and its presentation are always compelling. Timothy also listens. He listens with respect and an open mind. He is humble in his passion for healing and learning. I’m honored to call him my friend since 2007.”

Michelle (Shelley) Appel

Revenue Cycle Coordinator at Fraser, Reference written April 14, 2015.

“Timothy has a message and expresses it beautifully. He tells his story honestly and invitingly. I was moved to tears. I also work with Timothy in a community program where he is a very effective communicator. He has the ability to connect with anyone he meets. It is my pleasure to work with Timothy and consider him a friend.”

Fred Hundt, fhundt.com (Personal Website). Reference written on June 20, 2013.

“I have arranged for Timothy to speak twice to groups I was involved with and have heard him speak on several other occasions. His life story is amazing and compelling. He delivers his message of faith and love with an informal yet powerful style and approach. His gentle, thoughtful presence is a sharp contrast to the shocking, painful experiences of his past; he is a living example of the power of human redemption. People who have heard Timothy speak tell me how he changed their lives...I know that he changed mine.”

Jody Klescewski, International Sales Manager at Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.Reference written on March 12, 2013.

“Timothy has been a great asset to the projects we’ve worked on together. I have found his speaking skills exceptional, his attention to detail solid, and his attitude to be "positive" and "can do," as well. He has an amazing "customer service" orientation that is beneficial to service within the philanthropic community. I believe if you provide Timothy with an opportunity to succeed in the next phase of his career, he will. Feel free to contact me at any time regarding Timothy.”

Scared Straight

False Evidence Appearing Real!

Fear is not of me.

GOD has changed my END GAME
to my A GAME.

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love. Sound familiar?

When I was in prison, they had the “Scared Straight” program, and it looked like a con job to me at the time; it unnerves me a bit to think people are still using it today. Please watch this YouTube Video before reading my Blog (unless you are already familiar with Scared Straight programming.

Anger is a dubious luxury for normal people.  Toby has anger issues. He would make a perfect cop in Floyd County who apparently believe violence and threats of violence is OK. But if Toby plays his cards right, he could be a good cop who changes the system from the inside-out. Scared Straight is abusive in many cases. It's like fighting hatred with hatred, even though everyone knows it's just a tool used to stop youthful offenders from growing into adult offenders. Intervention is certainly needed with most kids. An admirable goal, but this type of fakery is evidence of societal mental illness. Showing them REAL prison stories might be more effective, like when a guard was raped and killed, or when guards allowed inmates to be killed or raped, or how guards have beaten inmates to death. That might help them grow up to be lawyers to build a better society. Truth is stranger than fiction, and they are trying to sugar-coat the truth by not telling them how law enforcement and guards are human and can be corrupt. That would show them what it means to be incarcerated. Putting them in cells, that's useful. How about if we lock cops up and subject them to the lies and abuse they subject others? Does that make sense?  Of course not.

Peacemakers, not Police-State Makers

So anyway, yeah, these 'real inmates' with cartoon tattoos are trying to help kids in the same demented way?  Probably some really care, but it's likely mixed with a reduction of sentence or early release for Good Behavior.   Who in their right minds would condone abusers to live out their fantasies of tormenting smaller and weaker human beings in jail? Having the power and using the power justly takes a real adult to step up, as a real man or woman to step up, and be true Role Models.

"I swear to God..." That officer will throw God's name under the bus of his power-struggle issues. When Sergeant Womack spoke wisdom to the young person, that was admirable. Showing the cellblocks was good. The Sarge talking about coming from a long line of alcoholics opened that kid up. That is effective too, yet it still seems manipulative with the Good Cop/Bad Cop psychodrama.

BREATHE…

…just breathe…

You just don't want to leave the kids with ammunition to think cops are creepy. We need to change that whole mindset. Appeal to the goodness in people, whether they are law enforcement or criminals. Cops and Crooks have PTSD, and until the trauma is healed, nothing changes. Retraumatizing and 'triggering' offenders are not viable tools for change.

Raise your love, raise it high. Don't let the world and its circumstances lead you to hate’s door.

Tearing people down to build them up is an outmoded therapy model for change and was discontinued in treatment settings years ago.  Hitting one’s bottom organically works, and intervention works, but it’s different than forcing solutions or imposing harmony.

If YOU are running the machine, I will never take responsibility for my working the machine.

It was a good idea to have kids talk to their folks on the jail visiting room (non-contact) phone.  Seeing your loved one on the other side of the glass without being able to touch them shows what it's really like to be oppressed by your fellow humans.  Personally, it seems crystal clear that Sergeant Womack is a good man.  I know one when I see one, even on video.  It's the cops and guards that are respectful, honest, and do the right thing even when it's really hard who are the true Role Models. 

I just want to point out that the family units that kids have severely impact their behavior.  So many troubled kids have alcoholic or even drug-addicted parents.  No constructive love to surround a child can leaves scars, not just wounds.  Some kids end up looking for love in gangs.  Gangs become their 'family' because they don't have a functional family (or maybe have no family at all, but bounce from home to home and become State Raised, as I did).  I served two major incarcerations and several minor incarcerations but now enjoy 30-years of freedom because I 'sobered-up' in a 12-Step organization.  The "Fellowship" members became my family.  They loved me back to health and loved me until I could love myself.

I'm an Ex-con and have been speaking to DWI offenders for almost all of my sobriety about sober driving.  If you love someone, you won't hurt them.  If you love yourself, you will not hurt yourself, either.  Being an obstacle to love and forgiveness keeps people sick.  Love heals.  Forgiveness runs deeper than the offense that requires its presence.  I've met countless people in recovery who expressed how grateful they are to the officer who pulled them over because they realized they could have killed someone.  I strongly suggested they actually go find the officer who arrested them and tell them thanks.  We all need that in life sometimes...to be thanked when we work a sometimes-thankless job.  My job is to get people to love one another.  LOL!  A thankless job at times.  So instead of giving up, I work tirelessly to help people drive sober, so they don't have to someday figure out how to forgive themselves for killing someone.

Here’s some parting truth: